Now for another public service announcement

I have officially seen the worst children's toy ever created.

Crayola color bubbles.

Hands down - not even close.

I'm not sure what was wrong with the old fashioned soap bubbles we used to play with as kids. You dip the wand in the solution, blow - and voila bubbles appeared. For some reason the fact that these bubbles were clear bothered the scientists at Crayola. They set upon a years long quest to created "colored" bubbles.

Well, I can say they did create "bubbles" and they are "colored".

You know what else they are?

A HUGE GODDAMNED MESS TO CLEAN UP!

When the "bubbles" burst, you know where that "color" ends up? ALL OVER EVERYTHING, THAT'S WHERE IT ENDS UP!!. Hands, clothes, floor, you name it - covered in what is basically food coloring. Guess what - despite the big "WASHABLE" statement on the bottle, this stuff stains about 90 percent of the surfaces known to man. Yes it will wash off of your skin but anything else is a pure crapshoot.

I'm not what one would call a neat freak. If the house isn't perfect, I don't really care - I have other things to worry about. House neatness is way down on my "crap have to worry about" list. This stuff though is enough to even push me over the edge.

Apparently the fine print on the bottle says you shouldn't play with this stuff on concrete (among many other places). I confess to having not read that because hell - where are you supposed to play with "washable" bubbles? Apparently there is a small list of places where you can safely play with the "washable" bubbles: A desert, while floating in the middle of the ocean, and the home of whatever Crayola executive thought this stuff was a good idea. Anywhere else is pretty much off limits.

This morning Josh attempted to wash off our walkway that was stained by the "washable" bubbles. He used a pressure cleaner with detergent.

Guess what? Didn't remove one bit of the staining.

Great. Now our walkway looks like Gargamel finally got his revenge.

I will say this... If you have to send your kids to a birthday party at the real "snooty" parent's house, this stuff is the perfect gift. Much better than a drum set or a baby cobra.